Thursday, May 29, 2008

The RIP Earle Hagen and Alexander Courage Post.

Unfortunately no videos of the I Spy opening seem to be around (The Mod Squad seems to be less fitting). Courage's best-known work - Judd for the Defense is his only other TV theme - has no such problem.


Nothing else to say.

Friday, May 23, 2008

The SAOR Guide To The New US Shows III: Back In Training Post.

Partly because of that accursed writers' strike, the upfronts haven't been as flashy as previous years, and to be honest most of the shows coming along (with the exception of one network) haven't really fired my interest. But does that mean no posting of my completely irrelevant and inaccurate views? No chance. This year's rundown to the new shows - apart from the reality ones, natch (and shows swapping networks, like Scrubs and WWE Smackdown! - and their chances of arriving on British screens is brought to you by the stars of last year's undoubted winner in the SAOR newcomers' stakes, Gossip Girl. (Apologies for the presence of Penn Badgley.)

ABC
The Goode Family
About: A family that defines "the road to hell is paved with good intentions."
Will I Watch It? I'm not a great admirer of Mike Judge's King of the Hill, and the title is a groaner. So maybe not.
Altierre Factor: This does not apply to cartoons. Usually.
Chances Of Being In The UK? Pretty good based on Judge's past record. But I can't see it on terrestrial.

Life On Mars
About: A cop who following an accident finds himself in the '70s.
Will I Watch It? I didn't watch the original version, so no.
Altierre Factor: Rachelle Lefèvre and Stephanie Jacobsen are not my ideas of ugly.
Chances Of Being In The UK? After Fitz (aka Cracker) and especially what's invariably billed in listings mags as The Office: An American Workplace, not the impossibility it might have been.

CBS
Eleventh Hour
About: A fellow who's called in to investigate scientific problems at the... you guessed it. From Jerry Bruckheimer.
Will I Watch It: See Life On Mars. Plus the executive producers include the folks behind Brimstone, which doesn't help.
Altierre Factor: Only Marley Shelton, so not really feeling it.
Chances Of Being In The UK? Since the original show didn't work too well, and since all Jerry Bruckheimer's previous shows have turned up over here, maybe.

The Ex List
About: A woman on a search to find her soulmate who she's already met without knowing it. Based on a hit Israeli show.
Will I Watch It? With Veronica Mars graduate Diane Ruggiero on board, maybe.
Altierre Factor: It's not out of the question that some may be drawn to Elizabeth Reaser and Rachel Boston.
Chances Of Being In The UK? Hallmark? Living? Fiver?

Harper's Island
About: A group of friends on an island in danger from a killer. Yes, that's a premise for a whole series.
Will I Watch It? No. Limited-sounding launching pad aside, it's from Jon Turteltaub. I'm not going through Jericho Syndrome again.
Altierre Factor: No idea.
Chances Of Being In The UK? Reunion and Runaway came over, so...

The Mentalist
About: A brilliant and unconventional detective. Aren't they all?
Will I Watch It? Well, I do watch Monk when I can, and occasionally the odd part of Psych.
Altierre Factor: Robin Tunney and Amanda Righetti. So not bad.
Chances Of Being In The UK? Possibilities - BBC2, ITV's digital channels, Hallmark...

Project Gary
About: A divorced dad getting back in the game.
Will I Watch It?: Well, Jay Mohr plays Gary so it could be worth a look.
Altierre Factor: Paula Marshall is the ex. But with her on board... well, with her record...
Chances Of Being In The UK? Don't know.

Worst Week
About: A man who wants to get in good with his girlfriend's family but can't quite do it.
Will I Watch It? See Life On Mars.
Altierre Factor: Not thrilled with Erinn Hayes.
Chances Of Being In The UK? Maybe not.


The CW
90210
About: The classic zip code getting revisited with a new family.
Will I Watch It? Maybe the pilot, and a few more. Dunno.
Altierre Factor: CW shows usually have at least a few reasons in this department, starting with Jennie "Kelly Taylor" Garth being back on board as a link to the original show.
Chances Of Being In The UK? Trouble? Living? Maybe even Sky One (which aired the original, as did ITV... which almost certainly won't show this)?

Surviving The Filthy Rich
About: A young woman having to tutor filthy rich kids. Hence the title.
Will I Watch It? Maybe, maybe not.
Altierre Factor: Joanna Garcia.
Chances Of Being In The UK? Not sure. E4 maybe? They sop up US shows.

FOX
The Cleveland Show
About: Cleveland from Family Guy getting his own show.
Will I Watch It? Unlikely.
Altierre Factor: Be serious.
Chances Of Being In The UK? FX?

Dollhouse
About: People sent on assignments with their personalities wiped clean afterwards. Or are they...?
Will I Watch It? It's Joss Whedon's return to television and no sacrifice of Jessica Alba is involved, so yes.
Altierre Factor: Eliza Freaking Dushku!
Chances Of Being In The UK? Guaranteed. Sky One or Virgin 1. Or maybe Sci-Fi. Even BBC2 can't be ruled out.

Do Not Disturb
About: The shenanigans behind the scenes at a successful hotel.
Will I Watch It? Arrested Development's Abraham Higginbotham scripted the pilot, and Jerry O'Connell's always likeable.
Altierre Factor: Not immediately apparent.
Chances Of Being In The UK? Better than chances of boring comparisons to Fawlty Towers not being made if it is.

Fringe
About: FBI agents searching for the solutions to weird mysteries (cue complaints from fans of The X Files, right?).
Will I Watch It? Despite the extremely mixed track record of Roberto Orci, ALex Kurtzman and J.J. Abrams, yes.
Altierre Factor: Anna Torv is certainly more promising in that department than Joshua Jackson.
Chances Of Being In The UK? Very good. Even after What About Brian and Six Degrees.

Sit Down, Shut Up
About: The bitter-and-twisted staff of a school. Animated version of a live-action Australian show...
Will I Watch It? ...from numerous Arrested Development alumni.
Altierre Factor: See The Cleveland Show and Do Not Disturb.
Chances Of Being In The UK? I think it'll turn up.


NBC
Crusoe
About: Man gets shipwrecked, spends years pining for his wife, meets fellow he calls Friday.
Will I Watch It? "Part MacGyver, part Cast Away, part Pirates of the Caribbean," eh? As long as the latter doesn't have the biggest part.
Altierre Factor: Not entirely sure about Anna Walton (Crusoe's wife).
Chances Of Being In The UK: I believe it is definitely going to be shown here, since it's part UK-backed anyway.

Kath & Kim
About: A mother and daughter who clash a lot. Based on the hit Australian sitcom...
Will I Watch It? ...which I don't watch and don't plan to. Ever.
Altierre Factor: There are those who pine for Selma Blair (who plays Kim) and even Molly Shannon (Kath).
Chances Of Being In The UK: Could go either way. The original show's been on here, so...

Kings
About: A soldier caught up in a battle between good and evil.
Will I Watch It? It certainly sounds interesting, though with the director of Constantine (ugh) and I Am Legend (better) on board it probably won't catch fire at once. The presence of Heroes alumni Michael Green helps.
Altierre Factor: Allison Miller (the king's daughter) and Susanna Thompson (Once and Again, The Book of Daniel) bear investigation. The latter also suggests worthiness for the right reasons.
Chances Of Being In The UK: The presence of Ian McShane certainly helps.

Knight Rider
About: NBC hopefully having the next Battlestar Galactica rather than the next Bionic Woman.
Will I Watch It? Yes. It can't be worse than Team Knight Rider or that Knight Rider 2000 TV movie, even if they replaced Will Arnett with Val Kilmer as the voice of KITT.
Altierre Factor: Sydney Tamiia Poitier is always hot. This will not change here.
Chances Of Being In The UK: Excellent.

The Listener
About: A paramedic who can read minds. Hello, high concept.
Will I Watch It? Maybe.
Altierre Factor: No idea as yet.
Chances Of Being In The UK: Hallmark, maybe?

Merlin
About: Merlin and King Arthur in their younger days in a revisioning of the legend. For some reason this brings up images of Young Hercules and that recent version of Robin Hood...
Will I Watch It? ...and therefore makes this a very strong "Not entirely sure veering on no."
Altierre Factor: Angel Coulby and Katie McGrath. Not bad.
Chances Of Being In The UK: Definitely airing on BBC1 Saturday evenings.

My Own Worst Enemy
About: Christian Slater finding he has a secret identity as a walking weapon.
Will I Watch It? Will anyone watch it? It sounds interesting, but it's scheduled after Heroes - and that slot has yet to do any favours for any show on at that time (Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, Journeyman, and so on).
Altierre Factor: Saffron Burrows alert.
Chances Of Being In The UK: Not out of the question.

The Office Spinoff
About: A spinoff of The Office.
Will I Watch It? No.
Altierre Factor: No idea.
Chances Of Being In The UK: See above.

The Philanthropist
About: "A renegade billionaire who uses his wealth, connections and power to help people in need." As you do.
Will I Watch It? Maybe. It does sound up my alley.
Altierre Factor: TBC.
Chances Of Being In The UK: Quite possible. Maybe even Five.


In memory of: 1 vs. 100, Amne$ia, Anchorwoman, Aliens in America, Back to You*, Beauty and the Geek*, Big Shots, Bionic Woman*, Cane*, Canterbury's Law, Carpoolers, Cashmere Mafia (Darren Star strikes out again!), Cavemen, Clash of the Choirs, Crowned: The Mother of All Pageants, CW Now, Dance War: Bruno vs. Carrie Ann, Girlfriends*, Here Come the Newlyweds, Jericho* (for good this time), Journeyman*, Just for Laughs, K-Ville*, Kid Nation, Las Vegas*, Life Is Wild, Men in Trees*, Miss/Guided, Moonlight*, My Dad Is Better Than Your Dad, Nashville, New Amsterdam, Next Great American Band, Notes From the Underbelly, October Road, Online Nation, Oprah's Big Give, Phenomenon, Power Of 10, Pussycat Dolls Presents: Girlicious*, quarterlife, The Return of Jezebel James, Secret Talents of the Stars, Shark*, The Singing Bee, Unhitched, Viva Laughlin*, Welcome to the Captain, Women's Murder Club.


* = Shown, or due to be shown, in the UK.

Monday, May 12, 2008

The Vaya Con Dios, Erica Rose Post.

This announcement on Erica Campbell's site (not the official one, which she decided to move on from long before the following - this one) has pissed off at least one person that I know of, ostensibly on religious grounds but I suspect more on I'm-not-going-to-see-any-more-naked-pictures-of-Erica grounds. Whatever you might think, you have to give her credit for convictions; I was, and am, far more annoyed by Ring Dings And Pepsi slagging off Heroes S2 and Gossip Girl. Part of me wishes I could be strong enough to make a decision like this.

I love you guys!

The Only Way Out

This message is to ALL of my friends and fans. I wasn't sure how exactly to start this...but I trusted that God would help me write this and maybe through me I could speak His word and make His will be done.....

For a long time I have been very lost. So lost in myself and in the world that I didn't even REALIZE that I was lost. I have always thought of myself as a pretty good person. I love helping people, I love befriending people, I love animal rescue and rehab. I care a GREAT deal for my friends and family and ALWAYS do whatever I can to care for them and make sure that they are ok. For a long time I THOUGHT that I was doing the right thing.....and doing my personal best......well...I was wrong...dead wrong.

Being in the world of adult modeling I see A LOT of pain....A LOT of heart break. SO many lost girls get into this business just for some extra money....to help pay for school....to help support themselves or even their children as single moms. "It's just temporary". They are only going to do this for a while...just a few shoots.
I too started out to make some extra money to help me finish school. Almost ALL of the time It doesn't end where you think it will.....the path goes on......the hole gets deeper....and the road gets darker. MOST of the time the girls don't even realize it. One day you see this bright beautiful girl shooting tame nudes...the next they are signing on the dotted line of a hard-core porn company. Lost. Broken. Alone.

I being on the other side of these pictures you don't see the pain these girls are in. The struggle....the drugs that they take so they can get themselves through these sets. Sometimes it's just a show....you pretend to be someone else..become someone you never thought you could be...and the hole gets deeper.

I never thought of myself as one of these girls. What I have been doing "wasn't porn". I connect to well and so close with so many of my fans. I didn't realize what I was doing or why.

The past few years have been very difficult for me. That is no secret to anyone that knows anything about me. I have been working my tail off to support myself, my farm, my rescues, my family, and the list goes on. No matter how hard I worked.....no matter how many people or creatures I helped I STILL had that void inside of my heart and my soul. Connecting with person after person through my site as REAL FRIENDS. I understood the loneliness of the people that I would talk to...because I myself was so lonely. The more I shot...the deeper my darkness got.....the more I understood the pain of others. My friends and my fan. There is ONE common thread to so many of us online here.....the need to be loved, accepted, cared for, the need to have SOMEONE understand you and connect with you. At the end of so many of these emails was that loneliness. SO many men have asked me what they were doing wrong, how to find a special girl like me for THEM. How to fill that "void" in their hearts...in their souls. For a long time I thought I was helping to fill that void in the lives of so many, and in a way I was. But it was all a lie. I could never fill that void for anyone...only be a sinful band aid for it. Only cause the loneliness to deepen....only cause my own soul to ache more.

I have been looking so long and so hard for someone to love me. Love ME for ME. Fill that hole in my soul. Complete me. All this time the only thing standing in my way was me. I have been blind and wrong. On so many levels for so long.

I have decided to leave the world of adult and porn behind me....and follow the lord. I have accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior and am devoting my life to HIS WILL. I have found the one thing that can, will and DOES fill that void...and that's GOD.

I have been trapped in sin and destruction for so long. Disappointment after disappointment......painful venture after painful venture. I have been my own worst enemy. Holding the key all along that could set me free from the darkness that had slowly enveloped me....that was eating away piece by piece my soul. Burning the light out of my eyes so slowly that I didn't even see it....didn't know it.....

It is will a new clarity and a new purpose that I will continue my life. I WANT TO HELP THESE GIRLS! These lost souls.....these girls that are ABUSING THEMSELVES. Selling themselves for NOTHING. I want to help them STOP THIS PAIN. I want to show them the light.....and the love of Jesus. ONLY HE CAN FILL THIS VOID IN THEIR LIFE! HE IS THE WAY....THE ONLY WAY.

I also want to help my fans...my friends......This void in your life and heart. You seek pornography to fill it....it's only a bandage. Sin isn't ugly....it's beautiful. It can't fill the voids in your life. ONLY GOD CAN FILL THEM!

I love my fans, and I love YOU. I want YOU to feel this peace. I want YOU to get out of the darkness that is all around you. You can not live with one foot in Christ and one in the world. Our time here is so short....today could be your last day here. And what will you have lived for? Died for? There is only one way to heaven and eternal life....and that is through Jesus.

I will not and can not desert my friends and fans. The models.....the world. I can't and I won't. I am hoping that the Lord will work through me and guide me to do HIS will and help those that I can. Those that will stop and listen....those that will allow the Holy Spirit to fill them and speak to them as it has me.

I know that there are going to be a lot of people that will think this is a big joke....laugh.....wonder if I have lost my mind....well....I have news for you.... FOOLS MOCK THE TRUTH. There is ONE WAY. And only one way. I have found that way. I have FILLED THE HOLE IN MY SOUL! Filled that void that I couldn't fill with anything else. My life isn't about ME anymore.....My life is about God and HIS will. I want to spread HIS love. Tell people about Him......lead people home to Him. I don't care what you have done.....how lost you think you are....how hopeless you think things are......I HAVE GREAT NEWS FOR YOU! It's NOT TOO LATE. God LOVES YOU! He wants YOU. All you have to do is accept His gift. IT'S RIGHT THERE FOR YOU! Jesus died on the cross for OUR SINS. The price for us has already been PAID IN FULL.

I will not be attending glamourcon or shooting anything else. The next and last person that will see and enjoy my body will be a husband AS GOD INTENDED! I have asked for forgiveness for what I have done AND HAVE BEEN FORGIVEN! I will spend the rest of my life doing the Lords will and the Lords work. I AM HIS!

I want you ALL to know that I love you very much.....you ARE MY FRIENDS! I want you to know God.....I want you to get out of this darkness...this saddness and follow the word of God. There is ONLY ONE WAY OUT!

I will not abandon you......

As always my email address to ALL of my friends and fans is: ericarosecampbel@aol.com. I understand that this is coming as a complete surprise to my loyal members who have joined my new site to support me and my new venture. I totally understand if you would like a refund for your membership. Please email me at: ericafanclub@gmail.com for a complete refund.

My life is beginning NOW. From this day on I will live HIS will and HIS way. My heart is HIS.

Serving Christ,

Erica


You always had more of a sweet vibe than other glamour models/porn stars, Erica. I hope you continue to get peace in your life. You've made a lot of men happy, so I guess it's time you found happiness yourself. And I know Teresa, for once, would approve.

And for anyone attacking her, there's nothing wrong with quitting porn for any reason... and be honest, wouldn't you rather have Erica Campbell out of porn, happy and alive than the precise opposite?

Sunday, May 11, 2008

The Nothing Wrong With Being "Boring" Post.

While on The View last week on behalf of a green initiative, Cindy told Barbara Walters and the rest of the bunch on the Loose Women prototype that she kind of missed out on living it up in her '20s what with being more interested in being level-headed than freaking out. Okay, youthful regrets are one thing... but if the price of being an "interesting" supermodel is to be Naomi Campbell, I don't think Cindy has much to regret. She might have more of a quiet life, but at the end of the day she's likely to rank a lot higher in people's affections than the wild and crazy guys (er, gals)... even though the videos of her taking her underwear off on Jay Leno's show and giving her husband a lapdance are two of her most-viewed clips on YouTube. It's the same thing with Louise Redknapp (the soon-to-be-mother of a second child might not be as in-your-face as that other wife of a blond footballer, but she's infinitely more appealing and attractive). I got no problem with that.

Comparisons to Janice Dickinson are another matter.

Here's Cindy in a 1986 Japanese TV ad:








much more recently with her husband:

and even more recently on TV. Sadly not The View.



And one more for my baby, and the road.

Saturday, May 10, 2008

The Victorology Post.

Let others know a little more about yourself. Repost this with your name followed by “ology”.

TECHNOLOGY

Q: What is your wallpaper on your computer?
A: Cindy Crawford. Updated from time to time, obviously.


How many televisions do you have in your house?
Just the one. There used to be two, but Sharon let her boyfriend have the smaller one like the good 'un that she is.

BIOLOGY

Are you right-handed or left-handed?
Right handed.

Have you ever had anything removed from your body?
The odd tooth, and a big splinter from under a nail when I was a teenager.


What is the last heavy item you lifted?
I work in direct mail; I have to lift heavy items all the damn time. But yesterday it was the shutters to open the place up.

Have you ever been knocked out?
I may have fainted once; does that count?

BULL*OLOGY:

If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die?
Tough question. On the one hand if I knew then I could prepare for it so everything I want to do would be accomplished... or I could just become a quivering ball of indecisiveness and dread.

If you could change your name, what would you change it to?
Nothing beginning with the letter N, for a start. Or O, or P. I might go for Robert or Charlie.

What color do you think looks best on you?
Blue or brown.


Have you ever swallowed a nonfood item?
I sure hope not.

DAREOLOGY

Would you kiss a member of the same sex for one hundred dollars?
Depends what they look like.

Would you allow one of your little fingers to be cut off for two hundred thousand dollars?
If it was the left one, possibly. Maybe even the right one. Depends, again.

Would you never blog again for fifty thousand dollars?
Yes. Pay up.

Would you pose naked in a magazine for twenty five thousand dollars?
Given that some very unattractive people have done nude spreads, possibly.

Would you drink an entire bottle of hot sauce for a thousand dollars?
Probably not. Put the price up.

Would you, without fear of punishment, take a human life for one million dollars?
No.

DUMBOLOGY

What is in your left pocket?
Yesterday's Spanish/English calendar page. Long story.

Is Napoleon Dynamite actually a good movie?
I haven't seen it, I wouldn't know.

Do you have hardwood or carpet in your house?
Carpet and some linoleum.

Do you sit or stand in the shower?
Stand.

How many pairs of flip flops do you own?
Zero.

LASTOLOGY

Last person who texted you?
FilmFan from GU about the Lost CDs.

Last person who called you?
Sharon.

Last person you hugged?
See above.

FAVORITOLOGY

Number?
4, 5, 7.

Season?
Summer.

Color?
Blue.

CURRENTOLOGY

Missing someone?
Anneza.

Mood?
Moody.

Listening to?
The sounds of silence (apart from humming, distant traffic, etc).

Watching?
The monitor.

Worrying about?
Everything.

Wearing?
Pyjamas.

RANDOMOLOGY

First place you went this morning?
The living room.

What can you not wait to do?
Fly somewhere.

Do you smile often?
It's been known to happen.

Are you a friendly person?
Not as often as I could be.

Monday, May 05, 2008

The Happy Birthday Dad! Post.

And it's a holiday as well!

The Hang On, Don't You Get "Heroes" In Spain? Post.

Because Spain's FHM rundown is conspiciously lacking in Hayden action. Or any of that show's other lookers. Not that there aren't any fine women at all - reduce the amount of "Who?"-ness here. Women who've made every list I've found so far in Verdana... and so on, you know how it goes by now.

1. Pilar Rubio.
2. Elsa Pataky. Yay! If Snakes On A Plane and Queen Of Swords had been big hits (or hits), I think she'd be better known in the English-language world.
3. Megan Fox.
4. Jessica Alba.
5. Amaia Salamanca.
6. Scarlett Johansson.
7. Angelina Jolie.
8. Carolina Cerezuela.
9. Patricia Conde .
10. Edurne.
11. Eva Longoria (Parker). The ice cream seller strikes again!
12. Kira MirĂł.
13. Penélope Cruz.
14. Adriana Lima.
15. Michelle Jenner.
16. Alyssa Milano.
17. Charlize Theron.
18. Ana Celia de Armas.
19. Hilary Duff.
20. Natalia.
21. Rihanna.
22. Jessica Biel.
23. Nika.
24. Keira Knightley.
25. Eva González.
26. Beyoncé Knowles.
27. Ana Ruiz.
28. Gisele BĂĽndchen.
29. Eva Mendes.
30. Chenoa.
31. Jennifer Aniston.
32. Virginie. I thought this was Virginie Ledoyen. She isn't.
33. Avril Lavigne.
34. Paz Vega.
35. Alicia Keys.
36. Carmen Alcayde.
37. Paula Echevarria.
38. Christina Aguilera.
39. Britney Spears.
40. Ana Alves.
41. Blanca Romero.
42. Shakira.
43. Carmen Electra.
44. MĂłnica Bellucci.
45. Fergie.
46. Marta Torné.
47. Halle Berry.
48. Keeley Hazell.
49. Lindsay Lohan.
50. Agurne Anasagasti.
51. Leonor Watling.
52. Vanessa Romero.
53. Merxe.
54. Tila Tequila.
55. LucĂ­a Lapiedra.
56. Marisa Jara.
57. Soraya.
58. Verónica Sánchez.
59. VerĂłnica Romero
60. Marbelys.
61. Evangeline Lilly.
62. Alexandra Jimenez.
63. Natalie Portman.
64. MĂłnica Estarreado
65. Natalia Verbeke.
66. Jennifer Morrison. So I guess not everybody watches House, M.D. for Hugh Laurie.
67. Triana Iglesias.
68. Alba Molina.
69. Diana PalazĂłn.

70. Ariadne Artiles.
71. Jennifer Lopez.
72. Rebecca Loos.
73. Raquel del Rosario.
74. Maria Sharapova.
75. Sienna Miller.
76. Natalia Jiménez.
77. Beatriz Montáñez.
78. Nicole Scherzinger.
79. Paulina Rubio.
80. Ana Beatriz Barros.
81. Paris Hilton.
82. Rachel Bilson.
83. Jessica Simpson.

84. Elena Anaya.
85. Manuela Velasco.
86. Cristina Peña.
87. Alessandra Ambrosio.
88. Sonia Ferrer.
89. Gwen Stefani.
90. Jenna Jameson.
91. Melanie Olivares.
92. Miren Ibarguren.
93. Joanna Krupa.
94. Paula Vázquez.
95. Teté (Natalia Sánchez).
96. Ana Maria Polvorosa.
97. Abbey Clancy.
98. Vega.
99. Anna Kournikova.
100. VerĂłnica Echegui.


There is indeed nowt so queer as folk. Bring on the French list!

Sunday, May 04, 2008

The Let's Go List Crazy Post.

Things to do: buy Awake and Good Luck Chuck on DVD since there's no chance of my getting to see either of them on the big screen, actually write to Teresa since I update my MySpace with the frequency of a mountain dancing, and find out every country's FHM rundown. We've already done the UK and US, but what about the 31 other countries where EMAP's pride and joy is done? And what can we learn from what Australian readers pick? Bold denotes ones I like, Verdana means they also made the US and UK lists, both indicates both.

1. Jessica Alba.
2. Megan Fox.
3. Jess Origliasso. One half of singing duo The Veronicas.
4. Lisa Origliasso. The other half of singing duo The Veronicas.
5. Miranda Kerr. Not half bad Victoria's Secret model.
6. Jennifer Hawkins. Forever ex-Miss Australia.
7. Kate Beckinsale. The highest-scoring person here who isn't American or Australian.
8. Natalie Imbruglia. Forever either Beth Brennan or "Torn."
9. Hayden Panettiere. One of four, count 'em, four Heroes representatives here.
10. Lara Bingle.
11. Alessandra Ambrosio.
12. Scarlett Johansson.
13. Rihanna.
14. Erin McNaught.
15. Adriana Lima.
16. Jodi Gordon. The first of several Australian soaps reps to be found here.
17. Ana Ivanovic.
18. Katherine Heigl.
19. Jessica Biel.
20. Emma Watson.
21. Holly Valance.
22. Tamsyn Lewis.
23. Natalie Bassingthwaighte. Is this really how her surname is spelt?
24. Eva Mendes.
25. Angelina Jolie.
26. Rachel Bilson.

27. Krystal Forscutt.
28. Pippa Black.
29. Beyoncé Knowles.
30. Gemma Ward.
31. Eva Longoria (Parker).
32. Caitlin Stasey.
33. Jennifer Love Hewitt.
34. Keeley Hazell.
Between you and me and anyone else who reads this, I'm seriously considering bolding her.
35. Natalie Portman.
36. Keira Knightley.

37. Christina Aguilera.
38. Elisha Cuthbert.
39. Jessica Simpson.
40. Cameron Diaz.

41. Nicky Whelan.
42. Bar Refaeli. See Keeley Hazell.
43. Gisele Bundchen.
44. Heidi Klum.
45. Kate Ritchie. Will she be here next year now she's finally left Home and Away? She probably will.
46. Jackie O. Australian necrophilia is not that widespread - this is a presenter.
47. Halle Berry.
48. Salma Hayek.

49. Reese Witherspoon.
50. Sarah Michelle Gellar.
51. Avril Lavigne.
52. Rachel McAdams.
53. Nicole Scherzinger
.
54. Kelly Brook.
55. Penelope Cruz.
56. Jennifer Garner.
57. Stacy Keibler.
58. Kate Waterhouse.
59. Maria Sharapova.

60. Ali Larter.
61. Isabel Lucas.
62. Sandra Sully.
63. Olga Kurylenko.
64. Sienna Miller.
65. Jade McRae.
66. Olivia Thirlby.
67. Emily Scott.
68. Lindsay Lohan.
69. Chloe Lattanzi.
70. Anna Kournikova.
71. Kylie Minogue.
72. Sophie Monk.
73. Gwen Stefani.
74. Doutzen Kroes. She's another one who's worth it.
75. Mary Elizabeth Winstead.
76. Candice Alley.
77. Vanessa Hudgens.
78. Mandy Moore.
79. Noemie Lenoir.
80. Charlize Theron.
81. Odette Yustman.
82. Marisa Miller. No relation to the less foxy Sienna.
83. Summer Glau.
84. Nadine Velazquez.
85. Amber Heard.
86. Amy Pearson.
87. Rachael Taylor.
88. Hilary Duff. She should not be this low.

89. Tahyna Tozzi.
90. Missy Peregrym. Australian guys must really like Heroes. Or Reaper.
91. Ivanka Trump.
92. Ellen Page. "It started with a chair..."
93. Mila Kunis.
94. Kristen Bell. You know you love her.
95. Emmanuelle Chriqui.
96. Natalie Blair.
97. Natalie Barr.
98. Katie Holmes. Time was when she'd have done so much better.
99. Ujjwala Raut.
100. Abbey Clancy. That's loyalty to the mother country for you.


Spanish rundown tomorrow, and the list of people who turn up on every list reduces further.

The Frank DeGroot Speaks For All Of Us Post.


Thursday, May 01, 2008

The Do You Really Want To Hear About The Mayoral Elections? Thought Not Post


There are already loads of bloggings about those most beautiful lists in general and FHM's UK and US ones in particular. Only a blogger with nothing else coming to mind would do another one. With that in mind, only people who I have some kind of interest in will be commented on, even unto explaining who they are. Favourites in bold, women who also made the US list in Verdana, both in both.


100. Holly Willoughby.
99. Marion Cotillard. Amazing how the makeup people made someone so foxy look so hideous... there's the key to an Oscar.
98. Victoria Beckham.
97. Roxanne McKee.
96. Nicola Roberts.
95. Dannii Minogue. The Hilary to Kylie's Haylie, in fanciability terms rather than success.
94. Billie Piper. I'm still not watching Doctor Who or The Secret Diary of a Call Girl though.
93. Kylie Minogue.
92. April Scott.
91. Kirstie Allsopp.
90. Amber Heard. Bears further investigation.
89. Kristen Bell. Veronica Mars! Elle Bishop! Gossip Girl! And how much UK press has she gotten for Forgetting Sarah Marshall? F. all. (Sadly, I'm obliged to see this as the main character composes for film...)
88. Odette Yustman.
87. Hannah Spearritt. You'd think she'd be higher than her fellow ex-S Clubber what with Hannah having a steady gig on Primeval. But nope...
86. Ellen Page.
85. Gloria De Piero.
84. Katie Holmes. Can she break away from Mr. Cruise before it's too late?
83. Katherine Jenkins. The lower-placed of the two Welsh operatic women herein, wrongly methinks.
82. Michelle Ryan. If Bionic Woman had been a big hit, you just know she'd be a lot higher.
81. Anna Kournikova. One of several former chart-toppers to be here in the Horse Latitudes (though at least she made the list - unlike Jennifer Lopez, Gillian Anderson, Teri Hatcher and Claudia Schiffer).
80. Agyness Deyn.
79. Mary Elizabeth Winstead. So much foxier than Bruce Willis's real daughter.
78. Gwen Stefani. Has been known to claim she's not sexy. Liar. (Bonus points for being one of six women I voted for to make the list in the UK.)
77. Denise Richards.
76. Chelsea Davy. It's not what you know, it's...
75. Petra Nemcova. Now happily single after Sean Penn gave his wife another chance. Thus improving both of them.
74. Stacy Keibler.
73. Tricia Helfer.
72. Eva Green. Bolded not for Casino Royale but The Golden Compass, oddly.
71. Fearne Cotton.
70. Sienna Miller.
69. Mandy Moore.
68. Nadine Velazquez.
67. Milla Jovovich.
66. Kimberly Walsh.
65. Emily Scott.
64. Ali Larter. The second of three Heroes ladies on this list. Bet you can't guess who the third is (clue: Not Cristine Rose).
63. Alexa Chung. A T4 presenter. Pretty but slagged off a lot.
62. Holly Valance.
61. Vanessa Hudgens. Yes! It's only a matter of time until Miley Cyrus makes her debut.
60. Cameron Diaz. You have to have Cameron Diaz every year. It's the law.
59. Charlotte McKenna.
58. Marisa Miller.
57. Jennifer Garner.
56. Mischa Barton
. Mike wishes Rachel had Mischa's attitude towards nudity. Then again, Rachel's last few projects haven't had straight-to-DVD all over them.
55. Abbey Clancy.
54. Evangeline Lilly.
53. Shakira.
52. Carmen Electra.

51. Emma Griffiths. TV presenter, I think.
50. Rachel McAdams.
49. Nicole Scherzinger.
48. Kristin Kreuk.

47. Monica Bellucci. Stunner though she is, the fellow on FSM's board who rightly hailed her hotness is nonetheless on my ignore list (you do NOT diss the Alba around me).
46. Halle Berry.
45. Katherine Heigl.
44. Alesha Dixon.
43. Nadine Coyle.
42. Bar Refaeli. Leonardo DiCaprio trades up.
41. Lindsay Lohan.
40. Heidi Klum.
39. Natalie Portman.
38. Olga Kurylenko.
37. Avril Lavigne. Because she may be annoying, but she's supremely sexy and annoying.
36. Sarah Harding.
35. Eva Mendes. Own-brand Cindy Crawford cannot and never will be bolded, not even with that ass.
34. Kelly Brook.
33. Emma Watson.
32. Sarah Michelle Gellar.
31. Britney Spears.
30. Maria Sharapova.
29. Rachel Stevens.
28. Charlize Theron.
27. Jennifer Aniston.
26. Jessica Simpson. Favourited because I still prefer her to Ashlee.
25. Salma Hayek. How did she not make the US list? Oh dear.
24. Sophia Bush. How'd she score higher in the UK list than the US one? One Tree Hill must have more of a British following than I thought.
23. Ana Ivanović. Tennis player. Apparently hotter than Maria Sharapova or Anna Kournikova.
22. Gisele Bundchen.
21. Adriana Lima.
20. Christina Aguilera.

19. Jennifer Love Hewitt. I'm not sure she deserves to be TV Guide's Sexiest Woman on TV, but she's certainly one of 'em.
18. Gemma Atkinson.
17. Beyoncé Knowles.
16. Rachel Bilson.
15. Alessandra Ambrosio.
14. Eva Longoria (Parker).
13. Jessica Biel.
12. Kate Beckinsale.
11. Rihanna. Or as I've started to call her after hearing her new single, Riyoncé (Rihanna + Beyoncé, get it?).
10. Keira Knightley.
9. Angelina Jolie.
8. Hilary Duff. Egotastic! still can't believe how hot she is. I knew that from Agent Cody Banks, darn it.
7. Cheryl Cole.
6. Scarlett Johansson. Her singing isn't that bad, folks.
5. Hayden Panettiere.
Do I have to elaborate? (The youngest woman in the top 10 for the second year in a row, and also - I believe - the highest-ranked young 'un on the US list at #11).
4. Elisha Cuthbert.
3. Keeley Hazell.
I have to say, though, that she's no Samantha Fox in the singing department.
2. Jessica Alba. Even a heavily pregnant Jessica Alba > quite a few here. Including...
1. Megan Fox.
Alas, Cindy wasn't there.