The Cindy Crawford For Deichmann Post.

The RIP Peter Graves Post.

Crap.

The Good! Post.

BERLIN (AFP) – A German man who tried to blackmail Cindy Crawford over a photograph showing the supermodel's young daughter gagged and bound was sentenced Tuesday to two years behind bars.

Edis Kayalar, 26, was found guilty of one count of extortion and two counts of attempted extortion after he demanded more than 100,000 dollars (74,000 euros) from Crawford, a court near the southern German city of Stuttgart ruled.

The shaven-headed Kayalar, wearing a grey shirt and skinny black tie, covered his face with a pink folder to avoid photographers in the court.

The Crawfords' daughter, Kaia, seven years old at the time, told her parents, who were unaware of the image, that her nanny had taken the photograph at the family home in the United States as part of a "Cops and Robbers" game.

Kayalar, a friend of the nanny, took possession of the photo and warned Crawford and her businessman husband Rande Gerber that he would sell the picture to tabloid newspapers unless they paid him.

The couple paid him 1,000 dollars last July and received the photo in return. But two days later, Kayalar allegedly claimed to have a digital copy of the picture and demanded more money.

This time, Crawford, 44, and Gerber, 48, reported the extortion attempt, triggering an FBI investigation in the United States.

Prosecutors say Kayalar, a professional model according to entertainment site TMZ.com, demanded another 5,000 dollars in September but he was deported soon afterwards due to immigration law violations.

He then phoned the couple in November and demanded they transfer 100,000 dollars to his bank account in Germany.

But Kayalar then became worried the money would raise eyebrows with social welfare authorities as he was receiving unemployment benefits and went to Turkey, allegedly to open a separate bank account for the money from Crawford.

When he saw that the case had hit the local newspapers, Kayalar feared arrest in Turkey so he quickly returned to Germany and turned himself in to police.

Crawford, formerly married to Hollywood heart-throb Richard Gere, has been married to Gerber since 1998. They have two children together.

The Olivia Munn Post.

First Audrina Patridge covers FHM UK, and now Olivia Munn? At least The Hills is shown on British TV; does Olivia have any UK TV presence? Does she? Please tell me.

The Cindy And Children For JCP Post.

The These Two People Should NOT Be Seen Together Post.

Last night the Royal/World Premiere of Tim Burton's take on Alice In Wonderland was held at the Odeon in Leicester Square (now that the threatened boycott is no more). All the stars were there along with a lot of the behind-the-scenes folks - I wasn't there, though.

But the great Danny Elfman was there, and of all the pictures StitchKingdom put up of the night's festivities, he only appears in one. Weirdly, it's one which he shares with Prince Charles and... Avril Lavigne. This one. (The musically-challenged but intensely bangable Avril chips in with a ditty over the closing credits, one of the few songs on the Almost Alice CD that's actually in the film - if not the only one. Interestingly, the fine-assed chanteuse is absent from the Elfman score album.) The look on his face suggests he's fully aware he's been sighted standing next to Avril Lavigne and probably isn't too happy about it. Or is it just wishful thinking on my part?

I refuse to believe Burton had anything to do with Avril's involvement (I blame commercial pressures, and people who forgot about Avril's horrible contribution to Eragon). Lots more pics here.

The Sweet 44 And Frequently Kissed Post.

Happy birthday to you...

Happy birthday to you...

Happy birthday, dear Cindy...

Happy birthday to you!

The No Wonder The Winter Olympics Are Short On Snow Post.

How do you expect the weather to stay cold if Cindy's around?

The I Refuse To Have Hayden's Fella In This Post Post.

Apparently Hayden's taken after fellow natural-blondes-turned-redheads Christina Hendricks and Amy Adams because she wants to be not seen as cute so much (unfortunately, like Amy that may be impossible...) and do something about the cheerleader image (which is understandable - had Fireflies In The Garden, a rare opportunity these days for her to do something not cheerleader-related, been well-received it may well have helped her in that regard). I have to say that it does suit her - almost as much as being blonde does. Add to this her passing the short hair test and she's likely to be with us for the long haul.

We will not discuss whether or not she's gotten work done in the chest area. And we will definitely not discuss her new, unfairly lucky guy. (This was taken when she was in Sweden a few days ago; she moved on to Germany... please come to England again, Hayden!)

The Good Idea, Bad Idea Post.

It's time for another Good Idea, Bad Idea. (At this point what with it being all over the Internet, spoiler alerts are a case of closing the door after the horse bolted.)

Good Idea: Putting two of modern cinema's most Callipygian performers, Jessica Alba and Kate Hudson, in a prestige project (The Killer Inside Me), thereby giving the former a chance to get taken something close to seriously for once and the latter a break from endless comedies (oh, and criticially and commercially disastrous all-star musicals).

Bad Idea: Having their characters get fucking beaten to death (Kate Hudson's first screen demise since The Skeleton Key [her body's intact but the character she plays is transferred into a soon-to-be-gone Gena Rowlands, remember] and Jessica Alba's first screen demise ever).

The End.