Friday, July 07, 2006

I worry too damn much.

Whenever I find myself waking up way too early, say around midnight, it's usually because someone's made a debit from my account. Tuesday night, I did that and Sharon wasn't back from wherever she was.
Result: Worry. She's not my daughter, she's not my wife, she's my big sister, she's old enough to be out well past midnight.... but I worry. I worry because she's the only relative I have close enough to me. I worry because I don't want anything to happen to her. Or me. Or us.
I should know deep down that if anything was to truly happen I'd hear about it almost at once, but still. So at 11:50 or whatever, when I should be sleeping and getting ready to be up at around 2 am or so, I give in to my anxiety and phone Shaz.
She's fine; she's coming home. I can relax. Settled inside, I go back to sleep and wake up at 3:45. Not much time to do much of anything online or on TV, but I'm okay.
She was on a date; the next time, the following night, she told me she'd be out. I got enough sleep. And left the worry for another time.

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